This Is The ONE Thing You Should Do This Week | The Mel Robbins Podcast

KEYPOINTS

• 01

  The one assignment for the week: do nothing

  Recorded during the week between Christmas and New Year's, this episode asks you to do nothing on purpose, whether for a minute, a day or a week. Mel admits she is "addicted to being busy" and finds it hard herself. She says constant doing keeps your mind spinning, drains your energy and stops you being present, and that moments of nothing are how you refuel.

• 02

  Doing nothing isn't just for the privileged

  Mel's first reaction to "just do nothing" is irritation: she has a company to run, bills to pay and kids at home. She speaks directly to people caring for young kids or ageing parents, working several jobs or night shifts. For them, doing nothing might mean finding five minutes or pushing the to-do list to next week.

• 03

  Most "achievement" online is staged

  Answering Jenny, a single parent of two who feels hopeless surrounded by achievers, Mel uses The Home Edit as an example: stylists and production assistants create those colour-coded pantries, and nobody's pantry looks like that 24 hours later. Rule one is to stop measuring yourself against impossible standards online.

• 04

  Only advice you adapt to your life will work

  Mel points out that many self-help voices are single, child-free, or men with a full-time partner at home. Advice from a 30-something with hours a day to exercise won't fit her life with three kids, two dogs, ageing parents and ADHD. She doesn't have three hours for a morning routine and is lucky to get 30 minutes. So she adapts: 15 minutes instead of two hours, three walks a week instead of marathon training.

• 05

  Stop calling rest "guilt"; it's an unfamiliar pattern

  Mel says what we feel when we sit down isn't guilt. It's weirdness: not knowing what to do with your hands or thoughts, because you have a long-standing pattern of staying busy. A world of phones, endless TV and emails also makes feeling needed a way to feel important and connected.

• 06

  Quieting your mind is harder than sitting still

  Mel separates physical doing nothing from mental doing nothing. Zoning out on the couch with a show counts if your phone and to-do list are out of reach. But sit still for five minutes and your thoughts race: the wall needs paint, the sheets need washing. She compares it to the mice in the walls of her old Sherborn farmhouse, who started a parade the moment the lights went out.

• 07

  Beginners need help to quiet their thoughts

  Mel doesn't tell novices to sit and meditate alone. She notes that her husband Chris is the meditation instructor, while she prefers moving mindfulness. Use free guided meditations through apps like Calm or Headspace, YouTube, Spotify or ASMR, or build a playlist that quiets your mind.

• 08

  Laziness, procrastination and excuses aren't doing nothing

  Truly lazy people don't beat themselves up, and Mel says that's fine if it works for them. Procrastination is a stress-triggered habit of avoiding tasks that need brainpower. She says research shows that starting is the cure, using her 5 Second Rule (5-4-3-2-1), because about 80% of the time you'll keep going once you begin. Excuses are actively talking yourself out of something. All three are busy states, while intentional nothing is a deliberate reset.