How to Achieve Any Goal You Have in 6 Simple Steps

KEYPOINTS

• 01

  Step 1: decide what you want, and know a dream from a goal

  Mel says a dream exists in your head and heart: you can picture it and feel it. A goal is something you do in the world. Compare 'I dream of writing a book' with 'I have a goal of writing a book this year.' She says most people skip this obvious step and never actually define what they want.

• 02

  If you can't measure it, it's a wish

  Ask how you'll know you've achieved it. 'Out of debt' means the credit cards are paid off. 'Financial freedom' needs a number in the bank. Mel's own measures: fitting into a size 28 pair of pants after hormone-related weight gain, drinking two quart-size mason jars of water a day, and holding a printed copy of her book.

• 03

  Step 2: write it down, because your brain filters for what you mark as important

  Mel describes written goals as 'external storage': seeing the paper daily reminds you, and through what researchers call encoding, the hippocampus treats it as worth keeping in long-term memory. Your brain then starts surfacing related opportunities, like noticing Ford Broncos everywhere once you want one. She adds that written goals are linked in research to higher achievement, and the note helps on days you lack motivation.

• 04

  Step 3: find the formula, because someone has already done it

  There are formulas for real estate businesses, motivational speaking, publishing, podcasts and weight loss. Mel spent two years researching podcast formulas (episode frequency, length, gear, advertisers) before launching hers. She says many people refuse to copy what works for fear of looking unoriginal, like skipping keto because a sister-in-law is doing it. Research online, ask people who've done it, or ask an AI tool for the steps. You'll put your own spin on it regardless.

• 05

  Other people don't block your way; they lead the way

  Listener Elise had been stuck for years on a business teaching teens singing for Broadway. Mel's suggested measure of success: five paying clients and at least one client landing a Broadway or off-Broadway audition. Write that down, then study the websites, Instagram accounts and marketing of people already doing it.

• 06

  Fear of judgment is often what stops you following the formula

  Mel says people often know exactly what to do and don't do it because they worry what friends will think. Her fix is the Let Them Theory: let them judge, think you copied, or unfollow. Then 'let me' do what the goal requires and act in ways that make you proud, which she says quiets the worry better than being told to 'stop caring.'

• 07

  Step 4: do the reps, and expect them to be boring

  Borrowing from business coach Jeff Walker, Mel says the secret is doing the tedious daily actions, like gym reps. There are no big leaps, only small gains, and 'overnight' successes usually spent a decade doing reps nobody saw. If it were fun, everyone would be debt-free with six-pack abs.

• 08

  Write an implementation intention: 'I will [rep] at [time] in [place]'

  Mel's examples: 'I will write for 30 minutes at 9 a.m. in my office.' 'I will do a Pilates mat class at 7 a.m. in my bedroom.' She cites an exercise study comparing three groups: people who only tracked, people who also read a motivational piece, and people who wrote a time-and-place plan. In the plan group, 91% exercised, which she says was roughly double the others.

• 09

  Lower resistance by naming it

  Besides the 5 Second Rule (count 5-4-3-2-1 and move), Mel shares an idea from psychiatrist Dr. K, a past guest: we're wired to move away from what feels painful, so admit it. Say 'I know I don't want to do this, but I'm doing it anyway.' Mel says acknowledging that it will be hard lowers your resistance. She reframes tedium as a sign it's working.

• 10

  Step 5: make it fun and easy

  After about a week of consistent reps, look for ways to remove friction: phone alarms, Post-its, workout clothes laid out, workouts picked on Sunday, a playlist, a partner, a class or an online community. Mel quotes James Clear's Atomic Habits: you rise or fall to the level of your systems.

• 11

  Step 6: don't quit, because coming back is what defines success

  Missed days, weeks or even seven months don't end it. What counts is the day you return. Mel points to Michael Jordan being cut from his high school team as an example of the perseverance behind most success stories.